Phil and Zack walking hand in hand during their engagement photos in Portugal

Phil + Zack

Together since 2018. Married since 2023. Ready to become dads.

Phil and Zack sitting together on a park bench in the fall

How we met

We met in 2018 after matching on three different dating apps. By the third time, it felt like fate, or at least a very clear sign that we should finally meet.

Our first date turned into a ten-hour conversation. We bonded over our similar childhoods, the coincidence that we were both from Philadelphia, and how much our families had in common. We also talked about wanting kids someday.

After that night, we were pretty much inseparable. Eight years later, being together still feels easy.

A few quick facts

Ages: Both 32
Home: Downtown NYC
Together: Since 2018
Married: Since 2023

A little about us

We are both creative, just in different ways.

The things we love together

Our hobbies can look pretty different, but we are often aligned when it comes to weekend plans, our taste in everything from food to art, and what we both want in life for ourselves and each other.

Skiing
Sailing
Beach days
Travel
Hiking
Interior design

Trips and adventures

Phil and Zack together at a mountain overlook in Vermont

Phil and Zack dressed up for New Year's Eve in Philadelphia

Phil and Zack together on the water in Ha Long Bay

Phil and Zack together at a scenic overlook in Portugal

Phil and Zack taking a break during a hike

Phil and Zack dressed for a wedding in Maine

Phil and Zack together by the beach in Los Angeles

Phil and Zack kissing in a New York City park

Phil and Zack together in a New York City park

Phil and Zack together at a Fourth of July dinner in Rhode Island

Phil and Zack sitting together on a sailboat in Annapolis

Phil and Zack together on their honeymoon in Thailand

Phil and Zack in tuxedos at a wedding in Arizona

Phil and Zack holding their skis in Aspen

Phil and Zack together in Newport, Rhode Island

Phil kissing Zack on the cheek in Carmel Valley, California

Phil and Zack together at a wedding in Philadelphia

Phil and Zack together on a boat in Mexico

Our wedding

We got married in 2023, surrounded by family and friends. Zack planned every detail. We'll never forget the feeling of having everyone we love in one room.

Zack walking into the wedding with his parents

Phil and Zack holding hands outside on their wedding day

Phil and Zack sharing a quiet moment at their wedding reception

Phil walking into the wedding with his parents

Our path to surrogacy

We talked about wanting kids on our first date. We both grew up in close families where people see each other often, show up, and stay involved, and we have always wanted to create that kind of family ourselves.

At 32, we feel ready. So many of our friends are having babies, and we are in a very baby-crazy phase ourselves. Surrogacy is our path to becoming dads, and we are excited for the ordinary days as much as the big things: routines at home, family traditions, trips, and adventures.

Our families

We both come from close Pennsylvania families, and both sets of parents are from Philadelphia. We see our families often, and all four grandparents are excited and ready to be involved.

We also have a big group of friends in New York and Philadelphia. In the past three years alone, we have been to more than twenty-five friends' weddings. We love downtown Manhattan now, but when we have a baby, we plan to move to a larger, quieter place in the suburbs, closer to our parents and with more space.

Phil's family

Phil with his immediate family at the wedding

Phil and Zack with Phil's extended family at their wedding

Zack's family

Zack with his immediate family at the wedding

Phil and Zack with Zack's extended family at their wedding

How we picture family life

We cannot know exactly what kind of parents we will be, but we know what each of us brings to the team.

Phil

Phil is patient and pretty calm when things get hectic. He is also the research person: he has already spent a lot of time reading about child development and parenting because he genuinely finds it interesting.

Zack

Zack is fun, affectionate, and a natural with kids. They tend to gravitate toward him, and he has no problem getting down on their level, dancing, playing, or being a little ridiculous.

We work well as a team.

We communicate well, usually see things the same way, and balance each other out when we need to. We picture two kids, a home with plenty going on, and lots of time with family. We will be open with our children about surrogacy from the beginning and give them room to be whoever they are.

Phil and Zack together on the coast during their engagement photos in Portugal

Dear Surrogate,

It is hard to put into words what this would mean to us. Helping us become dads would be an enormous gift, and we would never take it lightly.

We would hope for a relationship that feels open, honest, and comfortable. We would love regular check-ins and to be as involved as you are comfortable with, but we would take your lead. What matters most is that we trust each other and that you always feel comfortable being honest with us.

Thank you for considering doing this for our family. We are incredibly grateful.

With gratitude,
Phil + Zack

Phil and Zack walking hand in hand in New York City

Thank you for getting to know us.

We cannot wait to grow our family.

Phil + Zack